Biden: Space Aliens Have Hypnotized Americans
into Thinking Economy is Worrisome
Washington, D.C. (A.P.) –
President Biden today revealed that the Central Intelligence Agency, National Security Agency, and Department of Defense have discovered that aliens from outer space are hypnotizing millions of Americans into thinking that economic conditions in the U.S. are troubling due to historically high inflation, a tanking stock market, and cratering consumer confidence. 
While this highly classified intelligence cannot be released publicly, Biden assured it is “100 percent legit” and that he’d do everything in his power to prevent the evil aliens from destroying America’s morale. “Clearly, the aliens want to weaken America by making us believe that we’re worse off than we were under Trump, which is an outright lie,” said Biden.
“These space aliens are using high-tech hypnosis to make our news media believe and report that prices on food and gas are skyrocketing and hurting average Americans,” the President declared. “That couldn’t be further than the truth. The economy will soon be humming along almost as good as it was in the 1930’s.”
It appears that some Americans seem to be immune to space alien propaganda. People who still have “Biden-Harris 2020” bumper stickers on their cars strangely are resistant to alien hypnosis, intelligence sources say. Moreover, people with “Biden-Harris 2024” bumper stickers on their cars are virtually invulnerable to hypnotic messages from outer space regarding the poor health of the economy.
Consequently, the President is planning to mandate a “Biden-Harris 2024” bumper sticker for every car in America.
David Culver Brenner writes and produces, ProofsandSpoofs.com. His novella, The Un-Socialist Chickens, exposes the perils of Socialism by way of an entertaining story. He can be reached at dbren777@gmail.com.